Yesterday ended up alright.
I did see Jarrett. He replied to my message at 7 saying that he was home if I wanted to stop by to get the money.
No… I really didn’t want to stop by. But I like having money for the bills so I will stop by. Thanks, Responsibility… You’re a jerk…
It actually wasn’t that bad. He invited me in. We talked about our days, which gave me a chance to vent to someone in person, someone who would understand the frustration.
He told me about the issues he’s still having with with roommates, broke laptops, school, and work.
I think we both needed a few minutes of mutual understanding.
I had a cigarette with him, which helped my nerves. I’m not one for smoking, but every once in a while, in social situations, it can help me.
There wasn’t any awkward sexual tension. No animosity. It was actually pretty friendly, which was a relief and one of the positive moments of my day yesterday.
Meeting with the ex, done, and without drama. I’m totally cool with that.
If the rest of my day sucking was the price I had to pay for my meeting with Jarrett to not be a disaster then I’m happy to have paid my dues.
After that I came back to work. Since I had spent my whole break talking, I didn’t get a chance to eat, but with all of the discord I was still feeling I wasn’t really hungry. I know I should have eaten, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.
I ended up heating up my chili around 9, before the second lab started, and having the yogurt I packed as well. So better late than never.
While I was in my second lab Sabrina asked me to go over my method for painting weights, so we sat down with her file and I went over all of the different tools that I use, the options I set them to and why.
It was a lot of fun getting to dive into things I normally don’t get to cover due to the scoop of our class. And she took notes! I was so happy. My words actually meant something to her.
Desiree came in and we talked about scripting and I got to draw stuff out on the dry erase board which was awesome.
Marc, her boyfriend, was there so we got to talk about modeling stuff. Nicole came in to be part of the conversation. Luis dropped in for a little while before he went home just to say hi.
And really we just talked about totally different random things for most of the lab.
It was fantastic and I really feel it was what I needed. To just hang out and be around people. Relax and have it not be about what I could do for them. It was just conversation.
I ended up hanging out with them outside after the lab, continuing our conversation of randomness. I was at school until about 2am, and it felt good.
I came home, petted Scarlet for a bit, cooked some burger so I could eat again and not be a slacker. I poked around online for a little bit, but didn’t really do much of anything.
After a bit I went to sleep, and slept really well.
I’ve already written for the daily prompt today, which was actually a pretty good one. Yay! My coffee is almost done, and so I’m left looking at my tasks and what needs to get accomplished.
Today I have my yearly review. 3 years.
I’m trying so hard not to let that dig icy fingers into me. It’s going to be fine. Clavan already told me that I’m doing fantastic. I know all of the things I have done this past year. I know I’ve gotten the PROPs award for being in ‘the top 10% of my department’, or something lame like that.
But what if…
And that’s where I start poking my brain with a really sharp stick.
No! We’re not playing that game. No ‘what ifs’. It will be fine. Don’t make me put you in the corner…
Gah. That’s at 4pm. So I have the whole day to fight off my natural instinct to worry.
I need to get to the gym since I haven’t been in two days. I want to get some work done on my next assignment. I need to post the shading assignments that I completed Monday evening still.
There’s a new tutorial series that I wanted to complete this month that I can go ahead and set up the scenes for. Recording them shouldn’t take too much time. Then editing, uploading, and updating my webpage. Poof, done.
There’s a chapter in my programing book I would like to work through before the end of the month. And getting a little bit of stitching in today would be nice since I haven’t gotten to do that in a few days either.
I think today is going to be a smoother day than yesterday. Guess that’s my cue to go be productive.