Daily Post 0154: Calm Before the Down?


It’s not quite the end of the day, but it will do for writing. I have the time to do it, and solitude for the most part. The last lab is quiet, and rarely have questions. I’ve already completed everything else I need / want to do, so writing is the next item on the to do list.

I woke up around noon. I gently shook Zane awake since he had asked me to. I told him I was getting up and that he had wanted me to wake him as well. I have to admit that I was expecting him to go back to sleep. He’s done that a few times already; said that he wanted to wake up at a certain time, then not.

I was surprised and pleased that he actually woke up with me, though. And he was seirous about cooking me breakfast. He asked what I wanted. Not only was he getting up after only sleeping a few hours, but he was going to do something on my to-do list for me. ❤

Egg samich with bacon, preez. : 3

I got to sit and drink my coffee while he cooked breakfast. I was fighting off the last bit of NyQuil so I was sluggish, fuzzy, but the caffeine was helping to burn away the fog in my brain.

I was on edge a bit. We had ended on a ‘good-ish’ note last night. Having an hour and a half to myself in the kitchen had helped, and when I came back into the room with our dinner Zane left me alone as far as additional prodding. We focused on the show, which was pretty funny.

Nothing further was said last night as far as the shopping trip, or the discord that I feel we were both blowing out of proportion. Of course I think that only because it’s in the past and I’ve had all day to reflect back on both Zane and my’s perspectives.

I was in the middle of writing my to-do when Zane brought out a plate with my sandwich. He wasn’t hungry, so he didn’t cook anything for himself.

It was awesome that he set the plate down on the table before sitting in the chair beside the couch. He let me finish writing everything out giving me the space and silence I needed to do that. It was a good feeling. Like he understood, which I think he does.

We had a spat one time about it. I was in the middle of writing at my desk in the room. He had been in the kitchen or living room, and had wanted to clean the inside of my computer. He stated talking to me, and I asked if it was ok if I finished my to-do list first, which he said yes to, but then continued to talk to me instead. I waited for him to be finished with the topic then went back to trying to make my to-do list, but he was walking around the room, sort of talking to himself, so I went out to the living room, which was empty. I couldn’t focus on the thoughts in my head with the other noise going on. I had just started writing when he came out and started talking to me again. I thought I would kill something…

It was a learning experience. And I think that’s why he let me finish this morning. It meant a lot to me. Not only was he being super awesome and getting out of bed when he really could sleep the whole day if he wanted, but he cooked me breakfast too, and was being patient with me even though we had a super crappy day / night yesterday, which he most likely wanted to talk.

My morning routine means a lot to me, with my #1 task being “Make to-do list,” followed closely by “Enjoy cup of coffee”. Getting to do both was a great way to get the day started right.

We talked. We’re ok. He’s feeling less depressed, which I’m glad for. I’m feeling less depressed because it doesn’t feel like things are falling apart around me.

I made the salads for the week. I ended up going to the gym and running. It was a good run. I went to work afterwards. First lab was pretty decent.

During second lab I finished working on the project for last week. It was due last night, but with everything that went on I didn’t finish it. I’m frustrated with myself over that fact, but I’m trying not to dwell on it. I can’t go back and change it.

I emailed my instructor to see if I could get feedback for my work. She emailed me back saying sure and allowed me to submit the assignment. I have already completed the reading and the quiz for this week. Another 100. I actually am a good student when I try to be…

I completed the discussion post, and have already completed the brainstorming for the exercise for this week. It’s the ticket stub assignment again, which was actually pretty cool last time. I’m looking forward to working on it.

I’m glad I went to the gym today. I’m glad I’m not letting myself be depressed. Tomorrow I will get the money order for half of the rent. I’ll block out my concept for the ticket stub. I’ll go to the spin class like I want to. I’m not sure what else I’ll do, but I’m sure there will be more. Like cooking dinner.

Today hasn’t had any downs yet. I’m hoping it stays that way when I go home.


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