I’m still drained from last week. Doesn’t help that this weekend wasn’t all that relaxing and restoring. There was the mishap with the bike on Saturday. Zane and I had a pretty big fight yesterday afternoon. We got through it, but not long after coming to terms with each other people showed up for game night.
Luckily the Pathfinder game was canceled and they decided to play Black Ops instead, but that still meant there were way too many people over being way too loud. I ended up going to school to cross-stitch in silence. There was literally no one in the break room which was amazing.
I wish I had taken a sheet or blanket with me. That was the only thing missing really. Something warm to wrap up in.
I stayed at school until a little past 10. By then I was so tired I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to drive home if I waited any longer. When I got home everyone was still there, but they were playing Pandemic, which is a table top game, and significantly quieter than the drunken PS4 matches I was expecting.
I went back to the room after a small exchange of pleasantries, changed into pjs, and crawled into bed with Scarlet. Zane wasn’t far behind. I remember that I had dreams and that I woke up a handful of times which may also be factoring into being so tired right now.
Zane and I got up fairly early this morning so we could go to the bagel shop for breakfast. I got a chia tea. It is alright, but nothing can replace my cup of coffee and so right now my morning still feels sort of incomplete. After eating and picking up bagels for the rest of the week we headed back home so I could shower.
The bike was ready for pick up on Sunday, but with the fight and everything else we weren’t able to get to the shop before they closed. So Zane took me to work this morning. Can’t say that I mind since it’s roughly 40 degrees outside.
I haven’t been eating well these past two weeks. And I haven’t been working out like I want to be, or as I feel I should with a race coming up. Not having the bike for a week really messes with that. I could be doing stuff on my own, at home. I have the apps for it, but with everyone constantly being there, and not having space without moving stuff that isn’t mine… it makes it awkward, and the more awkward it is the more resistance there is for doing it inside of my head.
I know I could be doing things, but I can’t do them the way I want to, so I don’t do them. It’s a lame reason. More of an excuse really. But at least I know it is rather than pretending.
My goal today is to survive. Stay awake really. I’m tired. I want to sleep another 12 hours, and I’m not joking or exaggerating about the amount of time either. I don’t have much going on today. I have to print and sign some stuff for school. After work I would like to get the bike, maybe cat food though we should be good on that until the end of the week to be honest.
I know there’s other stuff I could be working on. The CRI logo design Clavan wants me to do, homework, a script I want to write to automate some of my grading process… all sorts of stuff, but right now it’s taking so much effort to sit up straight that the thought of using higher brain power hurts much less actually doing it.
Blarg… maybe I should make a cup of coffee while I have time to do it. Maybe that will help get me going. The tea isn’t getting the job done. I could also take a nap… since I’m here so early I have the time to do it before I get on the clock officially. It’s so early no one else is here yet, too.