I haven’t written a daily prompt post in so long… Not surprising the ones from WordPress still suck, which is sad.
No matter. I’m going to continue with the prompts from The Learning Network since those are pretty cool. Luckily for me, it seems I stopped writing prompt posts right when I reached the end of the “religious” section.
I think I’m going to work my way through the “personality” prompts. I feel that will aid me in finding myself in the wake of mom’s death, which is what this year of mourning is supposed to be; figuring out myself.
So, first prompt from the personality section…
What are your core beliefs?
What would you say is your personal credo?
How does that credo guide you in life?
I believe most people are inherently good. I believe everyone has potential. I believe grades do not measure intelligence and age is not an indicator of maturity.
I believe love is real. I believe emotional pain can be felt physically. I believe in being open-minded. I believe there is a difference between being alone and being lonely. I believe actions speak louder than words.
I believe everyone has an evil voice in their head which fills us with self-doubt. I believe it’s possible to overcome that evil voice. I believe every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.
I believe honesty is the best policy. I believe there are ways to be honest and not be a dick about it. I believe effort is more important than success. I believe failure can be a good thing.
I believe in being happy and singing along with the music I play in my car and driving with the windows down so I can feel the wind. I believe in playing outside in the rain and splashing in puddles. I believe in color pencils and glitter and paint and figures sticky with craft glue.
I believe in smiles and laughter. I believe in tears and sorrow.
I believe in running outside with the sunlight streaming down through the trees. I believe in sinking my toes into the sand on the beach and watching the waves crash against the shore. I believe in living my life for myself and not for the happiness or comfort of others.
I believe my mom is still with me. I believe she loves me and is proud of me. I believe in myself and my ability to figure out the situations I am faced with.
I believe I really will be ok.
I’m sure there are other things I believe in, like how the Earth is round and all that jazz, but I think that is a pretty good splatter art representation of what I believe.
My personal credo is:
“I realized one day that if my friends talked to me the way I talk to myself that they wouldn’t be my friends anymore. So I started being my friend.”
Often times I hold myself to unrealistic standards. I used to be extremely bad about trash talking myself inside of my head. My projects weren’t good enough. I wasn’t good enough. I would never be good enough.
Really depressing shit, that yeah, if anyone on the outside said those words to me their face would be happily acquainted with my fist, or a brick, or hot sauce in the eyeballs, or being locked in a dark room barefoot with legos strewn all over the ground because I’ll show you I’m not good enough.
Those words, “I started being my friend,” fundamentally changed my life. They changed my internal dialog from one of negative reinforcement to one of positive reinforcement.
I acknowledge my effort more than the success or failure of something. I’m more understanding with my emotions. I keep in mind that I’m human and I still make mistakes.
I don’t know… It just seemed to make a lot of sense when I stopped to think about it. I’m the only one trapped inside my head with myself. Every day, all day, 24/7. Instead of being a bitchy, shitty person to myself the entire time, why not be a nice, caring person so I don’t hate myself? I’m nice to everyone else. Why shouldn’t I be nice to me?
The evil voice is still there. It still tries to talk shit, and sometimes I still listen to it for a little while. But compared to where I was at when I was 16, or 21, or even just seven months ago, I feel like I’ve come a long way and I’m proud of my progress and growth as a person.